1. What is your first (knee-jerk) reaction to this situation? Why do you think you reacted this way? What similar situations have you encountered or heard about?
2. If the Christian reports that he doesn’t feel free to bring this up to his pastor or to the small group his wife and he are in, how would you respond? Why might many evangelicals not be open to discussing this with sensitivity? To what extent does “thinking Christianly” about these questions require all believers to come to identical conclusions as to what faithfulness looks like?
3. How would you pray for the lesbian couple? Are there things that you would not pray for them? Why?
4. If you would be unwilling to give them advice on building their relationship, why are you unwilling to do so? Write out a continuum as to the sorts of advice that they might ask for, and where, if anywhere, you would draw the line on granting help. (Advice on colors with which to paint their dining room, on establishing a household budget, on setting bedtimes for children, etc.) Why would you draw this line? How helpful is the metaphor of “drawing a line” in this scenario? To what extent are you comfortable with fellow believers drawing very different lines or suggesting a different metaphor?
5. To what extent would you be willing to share with them positive experiences from your own marriage as to how to build a strong relationship? Your failures? Why? Would it make any difference if the non-Christian neighbors were heterosexual? Why or why not? Let’s assume the neighbors were heterosexual but confessing materialists (and therefore according to Colossians 3:5, idolaters). Which sin is greater? How should this influence our thinking and choices? Why?
What biblical passages are relevant to sorting out this issue? (Be sure your list involves not merely texts dealing with marriage and homosexuality, but also with Christian interaction with non-Christians in a fallen world.) Also see “Homosexuality: Speaking the Truth in Love” by Mardi Keyes.
6. Would you consider exchanging baby-sitting with these neighbors? Why or why not?
7. Though becoming Christians would require this couple to refrain from sexual sin (as it does all believers), would it require them to give up their children for adoption? Why or why not?
8. The church is called to be uncompromising on sin, yet to be the most welcoming and safe place for sinners. To what extent have we fulfilled this calling? To what extent is this true of our homes? What might we do to better maintain this biblical balance of truth and love? How did Jesus demonstrate it?